Today I found out that I am not an only child.
To make this potentially long story short, I am going to give a quick summary of my family life, as I knew it anyways.
My parents were married when I was born, for about 3 years. They then got divorced and my father was around off and on till I was about 8. At that point I did not have contact with him till I was about 14. My mom contacted him for personal reasons regarding me but he did not follow through. He passed in 1994, I was 16.
I was aware when I was 14 that he had remarried and his new wife had children, 2 if I remember correctly. So I was aware that there might be step sisters out there but I never put too much effort into it. They were his family, not mine. I had never met them or talked to them or heard too much about them. I was an only child. I had no other blood siblings. That much was true.
A few weeks ago my cousin on my fathers side sent me a message saying he had the contact information for one of the girls, my step sisters. He gave me her info and I hesitated contacting but wanted to see if maybe she had access to any photos of my dad. She did respond fairly quick, was super friendly, and said she had been in contact with another girl claiming to be my fathers daughter. My heart kind of sank at this point. Only because everything I knew seemed off. I knew that having a real sibling would not really change anything, it would not have changed the fact that I was an only child and it would not have affected anything for me growing up. Not at this point anyway.
I sat with the information for a few hours. I went back and forth with what I was going to say in this message. I wasn't sure what the response would be. I contacted a long time friend, who was around when my mom was still alive, to get an outside take on things. I needed someone to go back and forth with me on different outcomes. Finally I decided just to make contact. For nothing other than maybe a photo of my dad. I told her who I was and who my father was, I did stress that I was not looking for anything other than information on my dad and hopefully a picture.
"Is it really you? If you are, I've been looking for you since I was 12 years old and found out about you."
The relief from the response was great and I just thought, if I only would have known about her sooner. I would have attempted to find her.
As we talked for a few more minutes she mentioned how her mom talked highly of my mom. My relief from the original response turned to confusion. How could my mom have known this and not say anything to me? She was always so honest and open about everything.
I did not have anyone to ask about any of this. My mom is gone, grandparents on both side are gone, aunts and uncles on my moms side and all on my dads side are gone, friends and family that would know are essentially all gone.
"I am to be dramatic for a moment and say please stay with me on Facebook. I don't want to lost you again."
I am a bit, oh I don't even know.....just trying to figure out answers to things I don't think I can find answers on.
I will update soon as I am sure there is going to be more about this....
Have you connect with someone unknown?